OMG. WTF. TMNBWCY. Did time just stop? I swear it did. I'm softly weeping right now because I was just introduced to these shoes, the most perfect shoes in the world, I MEAN PERFECT, and I cannot in any way afford them. Behold:
If I had these shoes I'm positive that Johnny Depp (as Captain Jack) would be an important eyeliner-wearing part of my life, you know? I'd feel complete, not to mention completely badass every second they were on my feet. Every second. Fuck.
Okay, since we're on the topic, did anyone watch Pirate Master last night? We tried but wow, what a boatload of douchebags. I think I might be losing my ability to handle reality television because it used to be where the folks on the show were just weirdos who didn't seem to care and now it seems like the ALL CARE A LOT. A LOT LOT. I just...really? I mean, they're on a fake pirate ship pretending to be pirates. Can't they just enjoy the immense stupidity of it and stop trying so hard? I guess not.
After a while, we gave up and instead watched a most excellent rerun of The Daily Show. It was the one with the insanely cute Air Force guy!!!1 Kenny is very patient with me because we already saw it last week, but Hollywood! So cute! If you missed it you can watch it here.
Finally, after flipping around some more, I settled on the Scripps National Spelling Bee because I wasn't feeling stupid enough. Nothing like being shown up by a gawky bunch of 13 year olds to make a girl feel like maybe she could have studied a little harder. It was great, though. Fraught with suspense and zits and braces. I wanted to hug each and every one of those kids just for trying. The kid who won was so fantastically nerdy and could barely hold up the giant trophy on his own. The look of pure incredulity on his face (paired with "damn I'm going to get whaled on for this but it's worth it") was so sweet. Aw.
Have a good weekend, kids.