Enjoy Yourself. It's Later Than You Think.

Wow, back at work after three days of gutastic fun. My stomach still feels like it has a small alien living within (NO I'M NOT PREGNANT) because the reintroduction of food has made it very vocal and blurbly. It's embarrassing how loud my gastric business is, right now. It's good times. Food makes it sort of unhappy and the lack of food also has the same effect. What can a girl do.

I feel like I've sort of worn out my welcome on this "I'm sick" thing and while wildly combing my brain for a story to tell I remembered something that happened at the upscale farmer's market where we sell jewelry in the warmer months. We vended in September and it was not terribly profitable, but there was an incident that still makes me laugh. It also makes my ovaries more uncertain than they already are. (There seems to be a running theme here: INDECISION 2007- ADRIEN'S INNERDS. VOTE NOW.)

Anyway, the story:

At the farmer's market was a politician giving away balloons and such. A woman who was vending a few booths down from us had a passel of kids and they all had balloons, which seemed to make them happy. Well, almost all of them. Her little boy (maybe two or three years old?) really wanted to let his balloon go, even though his mother told him he wouldn't get it back. He let it go anyway, delightedly watched it fly off, and then burst into incredibly loud, drooling, square-mouthed shrieks of anger when he realized he couldn't get it back.

To stop the shrieking, his mother handed him another balloon. He released, he was gleeful, he was utterly furious, all within a two-second span. Another balloon was handed over, lather, rinse repeat. At this point we're all quietly cracking up. It's funny! Yet kind of annoying!

His mother starts to get irritated (perhaps with us for laughing) and finally ties the balloon to his belt loop. This sends the little boy into a rage like I've never seen. HOW CAN HE LET THE BALLOON GO WHEN IT'S ATTACHED TO HIS PANTS. NO NO NO. His solution, which reduced me and the rest of the vendors to convulsions, was to remove his pants and try to set the whole shebang free. Picture if you will: an angry, crying, towheaded, pantsless little boy trying to set free a balloon that is being dragged down by his pants. He was FURIOUS, marching along the row dragging his pants balloon behind him.

Finally, his mother caught up with him and untied the balloon, handed it to him with a warning. And looked on with blank despair as he gleefully let it go.

You gotta give that kids marks for consistency, I guess.