Thursday, November 8, 2007

Top Ten Least Favorite Workplace Smells

1. Whatever that crap is you're heating up in the microwave.

2. Especially if it's microwave popcorn.

3. REALLY extra especially if it's burnt microwave popcorn. Thanks for the cancer!

4. You know what's worse than microwave popcorn? Cabbage soup. At 10:00am.

5. Mmm, I'm glad you propped the (unventilated) bathroom door open so that the smellrific-ness can waft down this way.

6. Especially if your stink is top-noted with eau du Tropical Ass air freshener.

7. Which, I might add, I totally threw away, but someone DUG IT OUT of the bathroom trashcan. OMG.

8. Thanks for not smoking right outside the door so I have to walk through it.

9. Hi! You're wearing too much cologne if I can smell it from here, hall monkey.

10. I need a vacation.


  1. Oh ain't that the truth. How about popcorn at 7:30 am, courtesy of Socially Clueless Secretary? And there's nothing like heated-up, garlic-ridden, garbagey-smelling Korean food! Don't even get me started on Lean Cuisines and Unhealthy Choice meals - so many people here apparently enjoy eating wee plastic trays full of chemicals and preservatives. Because I sit in front of the kitchenette, I a)use lots of Lys0l spray and b) always leave my desk at lunchtime.

  2. Fat Ass in AccountingNovember 8, 2007 at 3:17 PM

    What, you don't like my cabbage soup? See how much weight I've lost since I started eating it 50 billion years ago?

  3. How close is your workspace to the offending smells? My office is RIGHT next to the kitchen so they actually permeate THROUGH THE WALL and linger for hours. Uggh.

  4. I must admit I pissed off a few coworkers back in the day when I microwaved some feta cheese covered focaccia one time. What can I say, I was young and foolish.

  5. lol! very funny. my question: musk oil perfume? why?????